Congratulations, America, you got yourself a duly elected dear leader again, like a real democracy! He’s a doozy, too! Good job. And you got just what you wanted: someone who tells you who the icky and scary people are, and promises to do something about them. You can’t ask any more from a candidate than that, apparently.
God knows something needed to change. The fact is, you should have way more jingle in your pockets by now. And the reason you don’t is that all that money you should have is going to people who don’t deserve it. Not the billionaires, they’re legit, or they wouldn’t be so rich. Don’t worry about them—they’ll be taken care of.
Fact is, the country is being absolutely overrun by imaginary threats. My God, they’re everywhere! All those people trudging hundreds of miles through the desert to sneak into America and rape our women! That’s our job. Trannies! Pronoun pansies! Election workers! We’re going to clear out all that vermin for you. You’re going to be safe now. You’re going to be rich now. Daddy’s back.
Because you shouldn’t have to be paying three and a half bucks for God’s gift of gas. We’re going to end the war on fossil fuel by capitulating. We’re going to drill, baby, drill! And that’s just what we’re going to do to the ladies, wink wink! Whether they like it or not! Har! Climate change? We’ll change it back. We’ll take down all the trees: no more wildfires! Paper towels for everybody!
We’re bringing America back. Captain Nostalgia is on fire for internment camps again, and about damn time. The beauty part is you know it’s going to happen to somebody else, not all you straight white boys. If you’re a little swarthy, or a little swishy, someone’s going to be coming for you real soon now. But you don’t need to worry about that!
I kid! You’re not all of you straight white boys. You’re fine upstanding conservatives who figure that the worldwide inflation that happened after the pandemic is Biden’s fault and we’ll be back to buck-fifty eggs if we kick out the Dems. And just because your man is a racist misogynistic xenophobic white nationalist doesn’t mean you are too. It just means you’re okay with it. Nobody’s coming after your marriage, or shooting up your mosque, and you don’t have any queer kids you worry about, because your family don’t roll that way. Meanwhile the job situation is looking up. Boom times coming in detention sciences and strawberry-picking!
Too much government, that’s the problem. We’re getting rid of it; there’s no profit in it. Hell, they design it that way. Medicare is administered at 1.3% of its total spending, and how is that supposed to make anyone any money? Out with the FBI. Out with the IRS. Out with the obstructionist sissies at the EPA. Everyone knows government doesn’t work, and we’re going to make sure it stays that way.
So congratulations, America! Congratulations, billionaires and oligarchs!
And congratulations, especially, to Vladimir Putin! What a job, what a triumph, what a man! Ukraine will do nicely for now, no need for any of those other shithole nations to worry. Who would want them? It’s all cooked cabbage and consonants over there. We’re getting out of that mess. Good luck, NATO, time to pull up your big-country pants.
Before we go, though, let’s hear it for those spunky Ukrainians. Hell of a bunch of fighters you are! We’re going to put some peace on you now, and there’s nothing you can do about it, so just lie back and enjoy it. You know how it is. When you’re a czar, they let you do it.
Had a couple of friends who are Trump supporters. Maintained a cordial relationship with them and avoided political discussions.
I am so devastated by the outcome of the election that I can’t bear to see people whom I know support him.
These folks have reached out to me.
No, I’m not your friend.
I won’t be the one to reassure you that everything is OK.
It’s hard, when you know there is no part of your being that would allow you to even consider that vote, and it comes down to such a sharp ethical divide. I have to remind myself that it also comes down to a massive propaganda campaign that is all many people are exposed to.
It may be all that they are exposed to, but it is a deliberate choice on their part to remain ignorant. It is a deliberate choice on their part to partake in the thrill of destroying what so many have worked for so long to build and protect.
My rule is that I won’t willingly associate with anyone who votes for someone who encourages people to murder my family and me. I’ve held to that for some time now.
Please let me know when some real estate opens up near you. I need to get out of this horrible MAGA place I live.
You’re always welcome in Portland.
If Portland is too damp for you, you’re welcome in Benicia, which is drier, but that could change. Not cheap here…we arrived when it still was…
I drank too much last night. On purpose. Told myself it was part of my grieving process.
Woke up this morning still dizzy and probably unable to do much of anything today, my day off. Told myself that while the Dictator-Elect Fuckwad stole my joy, I’m voluntarily giving him my time. That shit’s gonna stop right now.
There’s so much I’m mad about, but what keeps bubbling to the surface is the thought “You got what you wanted. But I got it too and never deserved it.”
I have slept well for four years and am furious that ability may have been taken away from me. Again.
The ignorant won because they had no idea what they were losing. How very Christian of them. Heil trump.
If there is a more loathsome and weak facsimile of a human being, I don’t know who it is.
I wish I had something funny, or pithy to say. As much as I enjoy your writings Murr, I think I’m going to bury my head a little further into the sand.
There are worse places heads can be buried!
Love you, Murr. And this is fucked up.
It’ll be a fun year for Congress as the executive orders come down and pin its members against the walls of their constituents’ fury. I don’t know how long it will take that fury to ferment – will it be the demise of Doritos or the quashing of American automakers’ competition with Tesla, or US Active Duty soldiers storming your MAGA home to drag your cleaning lady out by her hair – but I’m guessing it’ll be about 18 months into The New World Order. Since there’ll be no Mid-terms, no protests, no legal recourse by then, all your disgruntled congresslizards will either serve for life and like it or be mortally sorry. It won’t be pretty, but at least I told you so.
Slim comfort, that!
Yes, I’ve heard that one. How could Trump be such a bad businessman if he’s a billionaire? Right, if in fact he is a billionaire, the way he stays rich is by never paying the people who work for him.
There’s a whole bunch of denial out there and a whole bunch of people who think they’re going to get what they want. Conservative justices, a theocracy and who knows what else?
Honestly, I think they just want cheap groceries (somebody’ll pick them, probably) and gas, and also to be able to stay at the top of the American caste system. The very best that can be said is they are massively ill-informed.
I am beyond scared shitless. Paul has cancer, and only can afford treatment due to the ACA. Neither of us had health insurance until Obama. I’m older and have Medicare Advantage. Neither of us could afford insurance on our own, but for these. What about the Mexicans I hire to do handyman jobs for me? They are prompt, excellent workers, don’t charge a lot (but I give them a bit more so that they will remember my generosity and put me on their front burner.) Will they be deported? They did a LOT of work for me on short notice, in order to get things ready for Paul to come home from rehab for hospice care: shortened the legs of our bed, put grab bars in the shower, and made a ramp for the back steps. Gringos would have charged me more than I can afford, and taken all day to do the work. My guys did the work in a few hours. Also, the farm market that I frequent employs Mexicans because American citizens quit after a day or two, when they realize how hard farm work is. The Mexicans have been there for many years.
I am old and have probably just a few years left. (I don’t want to live to be a hundred. 80 would be my limit, I think.) But I feel for the young women who have no bodily autonomy now. When I was young (just saying this proves the point that I am old), I went on the pill before my first sexual experience. I have been on a variety of birth control methods until menopause — which is it’s own method. I knew that these methods didn’t have 100% reliability. But there was always abortion, if need be. And now there isn’t. And even birth control may be stripped away.
I HATE that people don’t realize the consequences of this! All they care about is cheap shit. And the cheap shit won’t be cheap anymore. I’ve heard what damage the tariffs can do. I’ve heard how the price of food will go up without Mexicans working the farms. I’m old and I care more about the future of America than these morons who voted for Trump! And I’m a childless bird lady.
I’ll be hiding under the bed with a bottle in my hand…. Oh, shit! I had the legs shortened, so I can’t! Where the fuck am I going to cower in fear and whimper NOW?! I obviously didn’t think that through!
Hmm. Did you have a bomb shelter installed? That would be an option.
I have no ideas, words of comfort, no solutions. All I have is sadness and anger. Mostly anger. But it’s no match for the rage felt by my two adult daughters. The first man that says to them “Your Body, My Choice” is going to have a very different life afterwards.
But a lovely singing voice.
I am suddenly so tired.
Hope you can sleep!
Mass hypnosis, propaganda, Elon Musk, Electronic Russian brain attacks, demonic possession…with a dash of racism and misogyne according to taste.
I don’t know if it’s a low tolerance for ethanol itself, or a failure to metabolize it past the acetaldehyde stage, but it’s no fun. In other words, if I could get drunk without puking my guts out, I’d get drunk now and stay drunk.
Alcohol doesn’t do anything for me. Some of it feels like my kidneys are getting knifed and some just pisses me off. Can’t say I’ve ever had a pleasant experience beyond cooking with it.
I keep thinking about that supposed Chinese curse, “May you live in interesting times.” No thank you. I prefer to live my life without having to worry about being able to pay my bills and get the care I need. But seriously it’s been ten years since I was in that blessed state. But even then I had the legitimate fear of losing my job until it came true.
I’m glad I don’t have responsibility for people or animals beyond myself. There’s always an end if things get too stupid.
Oh, Bruce — your last sentence went straight through my heart. Fuck it all. I’m a childless dog and cat lady who raised three stepchildren and only one of them died so far. I’m married over 30 years to someone I love who refuses to get vaccinated. Some days I wonder when I’ll be a widow.
I’m not averse to “ending it all” myself if I get too sick to care for myself, blind, or can no longer drive (you NEED a car here.) Or if I outlive my money. Of course, I would make sure my parrots were taken to a shelter for re-homing first. I’m curious… what method would you choose? I have read that most people opt out of suicide when their initial method goes tits-up for some reason. But there are so may options!
At first, I thought carbon monoxide in the garage with our classic cars. But I can sell them and have a bit more money to live on. There are numerous train tracks nearby, but I’d only choose that if there was no other alternative. I really would not like to fuck up someone’s mind by doing that.
I’ve since decided, since I have really sharp box-cutters and a bath tub, AND know that you cut the wrists lengthwise, not crosswise, that would be the way. My neighbor has my house keys. I would send her a letter telling her what I did, and NOT to come over. Just call 911. Debbie is too nice a person to fuck up her mind, too.
I know this is a morbid conversation to have, but I feel that we are all friends here — in a way — and can be honest with one another. I treasure the people in my life who I can be honest with more than I do people who I have to sugar-coat things with. And no, I am not considering suicide right now. But I’m a realist. We all die. I don’t want to linger. I’m seeing that all too well with Paul. The lack of autonomy. Being institutionalized. Having someone else have to wipe your ass. It’s the ultimate DIY!!
Anyway, I’d appreciate other Ideas, as there may be more options out there that I never considered. I could keep Paul’s oxy and take a major overdose, for instance, instead of getting rid of it.
So what would be your way?
Check into https://www.peacefulpillhandbook.com/. Lots of information there and updated constantly. Nembutal seems to be the method of choice but they have other suggestions. I don’t know what particular conditions would ever move me to kill myself, but they wouldn’t be blindness or having my ass wiped or running out of money. YMMV.
I live in a red state where their joy is such that men are having parades and flipping women off and school age boys are gleefully shouting ‘worthless women’ at girls. It’s disheartening to hear that people voted for him because when he was president their favorite peanut butter cookies were 99 cents and now they’re $2.99 (that was a comment from a woman who voted for him).
As if there could be ANY JUSTIFICATION for elevating this insane degenerate to the highest office in the world. Fucking grocery prices.
The beauty part is Trump would do nothing whatsoever to lower grocery prices or gas prices, and Biden did a hell of a job with the economy. He’s handing it over in good shape.
All of you, and your comments, bring me hope that we will get through this, together. We, as in US citizens. I’m a wimp. I left for New Zealand, a month ago, to hide out for what I figured would be a long and contentious voting cycle. The minute I speak, it’s a dead giveaway, and the locals would cautiously ask what I thought was happening in the before days. Then quickly embrace me as “one of us” as i insisted it could never happen. I feel so lost now. Afraid to return home, yet that isn’t really an option without some work (and perhaps – assets). This morning was I paging through the google suggestions about that – how to stay – what this election means for the other countries, such as the one I now find myself in: “According to Statistics New Zealand, the region’s biggest export is milk powder, butter and cheese, topping out at a generous $11.2 billion, which is closely followed by business & personal travel at $10 billion followed by meat, wool and wood/logs. Trade is essential to New Zealand’s economic prosperity.” Trade is essential. Oh, god. If there is one.
Our eldest and his family left here years ago — first for the UK, and when that started to curdle, for New Zealand, where they seem to be quite happy. It helps that his wife is an MD, so always a desirable immigrant. Moving there without skills they want is VERY expensive.
New Zealand might be my first choice, but I’ll stick with good ol’ Oregon.
I had to laugh at articles that said the ex’s had made a comeback. That was false though because he never went away, and constantly reminded everyone who would listen that he had been cheated out of his rightful position because the ‘system’ had been rigged.
Suddenly, the system worked and it is happy ever after. The ex had gotten everything a spoiled child could want, even before Christmas. A person who believes that God spared him to save America.
I don’t know why some people haven’t realized that every time the ex said “we need to make America great again” that was actually an insult to every man, woman and even sadly some children, who got up and went to work every single day. So, they were somehow failing at their jobs? Duds?
But let’s face it, for years monopolies and private equity have taken over without even a fuss. Local grocery stores, drug stores, shops, diners, banks, newspapers,and even medical practices (and hospitals) are a thing of the past. As Americans we bought into the cheaper is better and the more the merrier. Why should we give that up? It should just keep rolling on and on and on….and that doesn’t even include the gas, electronics, AI (which uses ungodly amounts of electricity).
We can’t have something for nothing without paying the price…And it seems, for now, that we may have to pay the price.
“God” didn’t spare his life to “save America.” The guy who aimed at him was a crappy shot. Dude! If you’re going to try to take someone out… PRACTICE! I don’t go around wishing for people’s demise. But in his case, I make an exception. And with his “diet” and lack of exercise, how is he not dead yet?!
The only problem with that NOW is that then Vance would become president, and he actually has half a brain and can do more harm than “the ex.”
You’re making an excellent case for assault weapons. Gotta take a lot of people out at once.
As a type 1 diabetic, my way would be an insulin overdose. It’s painless, cheap and available. No hospitalizations, no medications,, cheap and 100% effective. I’ve told all family and friends of my intentions and while it’s possible .that I’d change my mind, i rather doubt that I will. Meanwhile, I’m enjoying the spectacular red and gold trees in my ‘hood. The 80 foot tall horse chestnut leaves fill the street and birdie songs fill the air.
Wait, does that work if you’re not a diabetic?
Yes. But you need a prescription for insulin. So lucky me, sigh.
You’re sure it’s painless?
I’d choose pills of some kind if I were to off myself. Go to sleep and not wake up. Wouldn’t want to leave a mess.
However, I’d rather leave the country than off myself. Looking at NZ and Ireland. Both have income/asset requirements to retire there. But in Ireland you have to reapply every year and if your income falls below their minimum requirement you’d have to leave. So it’s kind of risky.
For now will see what the next year brings and if people start running for the midterms. If they’re going to axe the midterms they would have to do it early, I think. That will be my sign to get out for sure.
I have to admit I don’t know what the point is in leaving. I’ll just leave that there. Perfectly willing to be instructed in this regard.