Here is one thing you can count on if you’re reading the blog of a rapidly aging blogger. You’re going to read about all the rapid aging. Which is truly startling, even to the reporter. You’re trucking along in life with a sort of steady deterioration that transpires slowly enough you can pretend it isn’t happening, and then WHAM, someone turns off the hormone spigot and everything goes straight to hell. Mostly the cosmetic stuff, but your recognition that you no longer need to be physically desirable lags behind the reality, so you’re unduly disturbed by it. Then there’s an adjustment that happens when you settle in to the new status of being someone no one needs to be attracted to.
So now let’s chat about arthritis, shall we?
Talk about sudden. One day I noticed my index finger was a little sore. It seemed normal enough especially since I got a doozy of a wound there a while back. I had flayed it open on a can lid so thoroughly I could see twenty layers of flesh with little alien teeth gaping back at me between spurts of blood which, by the way, showed no signs of slowing down for several days no matter how tight the bandage. I was pondering whether a person could bleed out through a fingertip at one point. But eventually the little sucker closed up again.
And then, a year or so later, the soreness. Huh, said I. Did my finger just have a flashback? Well no. What it did was swell up in a decidedly bony way and quit being able to bend properly. And it did this over the course of a few weeks. It looks like a snake that ate a small pig. I have glared the heck out of it but it is not easily intimidated.
This is not part of the plan. The plan is to sail smoothly into my hundredth year with a little slow-down but no pain or illness to speak of and to shuffle off my mortal coil, revealing the pink unblemished soul of the eight-year-old I’ve always felt like. That was the plan.
Arthritis was this mystery thing that elderly people have for no good reason. I thought it was just part of the old lady kit, along with the little pocketbook and the hat with a net on it and the rolled-down nylons. It was the old-lady bric-a-brac that they accumulate and the kids will never want it.
Anyway, now I have a big sore knobby knuckle on a finger that was just fine mere weeks ago. And I looked it up. There’s no fixing it. Speaking of plans, I had plans for that finger. I need it to pull weeds with, write with, draw with. I need it to not hit two piano keys at the same time. That finger has more to do than just operate the TV remote. Seems to me some other person, a more sedentary person with no hobbies, shall we say a lesser person in some ways, could have been saddled with my arthritis, and not been much the worse for it.
Well, thought I, maybe my earlier injury had something to do with this new affliction, and this will be as far as it goes. But a few nights ago, I noticed my other index finger was inexplicably sore. In exactly the same way. Especially when I bend it, which I still can. Like, one day it was fine, and the next day it said: I think I’ll whomp me up some more arthritis. Sudden as anything. This is not a good trajectory. If all my fingers start swelling up I’ll have to use tools to mine boogers. It’s not a good look. (I’m told the other thing wasn’t a good look either.)
Okay. The suddenness of all this has got my attention. It was like if all my new hairs exploded out of my chin at once, audibly. But yes, children, I am aware that people can become flat-out elderly overnight. They fall and break their hips. They have a stroke. They get a high fever. They go from being just fine to not fine at all in a heartbeat. It’s too big a loss to comprehend, let alone absorb, all at once. I am a big fat baby writing about my finger. I know that.
But it’s my blog. And I’m the big fat baby with the big fat finger. Deal.
Murr, I’m right there with you. I was walking briskly, like a New Yorker. Hiking in the woods. Working in the yard. I literally went to bed one night when I was 65, and climbed out of bed in the morning… but experienced excruciating pain in my left knee whenever I walked. I thought maybe I twisted it while sleeping (Paul and I are both prone to injuries while sleeping.) But it still hurt just as much days later. Turns out I have osteoarthritis. I started getting acupuncture for it, which helped. I didn’t want to get steroid shots for it, because my optometrist told me that steroids can exacerbate any tendency toward glaucoma.
Along with monthly acupuncture, there are a couple creams that help with the pain. I have a salve that contains cannabinoids that helps a lot. (I have to go over the state line to PA to get it.) Also, an online site called Herbalist & Alchemist has a roll-on balm. It smells a bit like ginger, but it works well, too. (It’s called Dragon’s Dream.) It’s run by an herbalist named David Winston. I took a few herb classes with him when I was young, sometimes the classes involved hiking in the woods and spotting medicinal botanicals. This is what got me into hiking.
And, finally, my plumber and I were talking while he was working, and he’s big on supplements. He told me about two in particular that help him: Bromelain and Boswellia. The pain has diminished a LOT since I started taking them. Since they don’t carry them in our local drugstore, I get it online from The Vitamin Shoppe.
Now none of this makes the pain go away completely, but it no longer makes me think, “just kill me now.” Some days I can even walk briskly. And my fingers are still gnarled, but at least they don’t hurt, except when I try to open a tight jar lid and overdo it. And I still walk down steps sideways, like a crab. The stiffness is still there, but at least I don’t have to avoid stairs.
I hope you find something that works well for you.
I have a CBD salve also. Not so much for pain as for reducing inflammation and hopefully preventing future arthritis. I have no idea if it’s doing anything for me.
I’m sorry about your finger. You baby.
You mean “You big baby.”
Be as much of a “baby” as you want. It’s warranted. It’s alarming and painful. It gets in the way of so much you want to do. Love to do. Have done all your life. F*** arthritis! And trigger fingers! I find relief from diclofenac gel (Voltaren). Maybe try a Dremel for the boogers.
I was kidding about the boogers. I can totally use my little finger.
I totally get it. I first had this experience when my feet decided to grow bunions. That I’ve gotten used to over the years. But my most recent development is, I suddenly fear falling to the extent that I go down the steps one at a time while looking at my feet and am terrified of going UP steps unless I have a railing to haul myself up with. I keep envisioning falling backwards and hitting my head and being dead. Uneven pavement is daunting to me now too. How did we get here???
OMG! YES! I, too, fear falling. Paul had to put railings in our attic and basement stairs. (Our freezer is in the basement, so sometimes I have to go down there.) I have those visions as well. One of our neighbors actually did that and died. His daughter couldn’t contact him for three days and had the police do a wellness check. He was dead on the basement’s concrete floor. It freaked everyone in the neighborhood out a bit, as we are all in that demographic. I even am leery of stepstools… which I have to use as I am SO short.
Well, I’m not that confident on a ladder anymore, but I’m not afraid of falling so much. Feels like my bones are really strong (and my bone density report confirms it) and I don’t have very far to fall.
It’s a damn shame this stuff doesn’t come with advanced warning. Like, two months in advance you get a note saying, “Buckle up, Buttercup! Arthur Ritus is a comin’ to your hands. Get all that fancy hand workin’ done while you can “cause before you know it, it’s gonna be a thing of the past. ” But no. It’s wham, bam, no thank you ma’am. Mandatory senility is just around the corner. And it totally sucks and you are not being a baby.
Well, I am. But people like babies, don’t they?
If they are prepared properly they are very tasty. 😈
Ha ha!
I really am sorry. I f*cks with your brain as much as anything, the getting old thing. My inner 8 year old is not happy.
It gets harder to imagine one’s time is unlimited.
Wow, am I glad to hear others crab walk up and down stairs. I put a chair in front of the stair well upstairs so that I don’t accidently slip and fall down when I am walking by. (I sew upstairs so I spend plenty of time there.). And I really thought I was prepared for all of this…
That is a good idea. Although I once encountered a chair in a darkened room (had been left there to reach the smoke alarm) and tipped it over and fell into it, one chair leg solidly in my gut. Somehow that was survivable.
Yeah, you’re right. And it’s likely just getting started.
I think I’m a bit older, 78, than most here, and I can tell you it don’t quit.
The positive things are you just…cope. It becomes the new norm. That swelling in my toe? It’s a bit less than a month ago, but it’s still here.
My chf? It don’t go away, and yeah, it progresses. Pretty soon I’ll need to decide if I’m going to do the home oxygen route or not. Undecided.
The positive..my kids sense stuff, they call often, and one just get’s used to the idea you won’t be here in a few years. And that’s a relief and of course a worry, about those you leave.
But…you can’t fix that.
Hope this isn’t too bleak.
We do bleak here, and know we’re in good company.
Nope, I’m 86. And I love it that all your aches and pains match mine! I can relate!
I’m glad that we are all in the same demographic and have many of the same maladies. It helps to talk with others about it, and even though we all have never met, I feel friendship with all you “constant commenters”. If I didn’t talk to other older people about my arthritis, I never would have found the cannibinoid salve or learned from my plumber about the supplements that have been working so well. I mean, we can’t really talk to younger people about this; they have never experienced this decline. They are still young and immortal. I used to be that way once. Boy, has THAT ever changed! I had to drive at night for the first time in years, on the interstate. I was white-knuckling it the whole time, and could have used a mouth-guard, as I was grinding my teeth. During the day, I’m fine, and even go over the speed limit. This time, I was well under, with cars whizzing past me.
All true Mike. Perspective adjusts all the time. I’m sure sorry about your oxygen depletion. That’s rough. I’m going to go talk to my finger and tell it to quit whining now.
I used to have gold plated health insurance from Rutgers and saw a rheumatologist twice a year for hip and shoulder issues. Steroid shots and Celebrex. The side effects from Celebrex were extreme but I didn’t realize it until after I lost my health insurance and the prescription ran out. Celebrex causes extreme vertigo, as in falling out of chairs head spinning. It also does something to REM sleep. I’m used to having very vivid dreams. During the period I was taking it, I don’t recall any dreams. After the effects wore off (it builds up in your system and takes awhile to wear off), the vivid dreams returned and I could walk around without feeling like the world was spinning.
I take glucosamine chondroitin which helps with knee issues. I tried bromelain. There was a side effect. I forget what it was, just that I needed to stop taking it.
I use Voltaren topical rub and that helps a lot. I also take acetaminophen, but nowhere near the maximum recommended daily dosage.
I don’t have enlarged joints, but my mom and grandparents do and did. I have hip dysplasia and been dealing with pain from that for decades. Partially dislocated my right hip twice. There’s nothing like suddenly having your body shift to one side and looking down and seeing your hip has just gotten several inches wider.
The latest fun has been from a now decade old knee injury that’s been untreated due to no insurance at the time of the injury and an insanely high deductible now. Last spring I aggravated it on a job to move several tons of school furniture up three flights of stairs. Now the knee clicks going up stairs and sometimes coming down and getting up from a kneeling position is an adventure.
Bruce, as to getting up from the floor, I find it helps to have a back-up plan. Like how the hell do I get back up??? For some reason, grunting helps. But when I do this, Paul usually asks me if I’m okay. It’s both sweet and annoying that he asks this so much. Or that he has to.
I usually pull myself up by grabbing onto something. It doesn’t particularly hurt, but it’s definitely an effort. Gone are the days when I could spring to my feet from sitting on the floor. Well, actually those days are long gone!
I don’t get down on the floor without first having a plan for how I’ll get up again.
Or, a pillow and a blankie.
I consider this site a safe harbor for discussing all things unmentionable. Please keep being a public Big Baby about things!
The information from your readers is an invaluable resource as well, donchaknow.
Man, we do skew old, don’t we?
Old and irreverent. What a combo!
Over worked my left thumb initially polishing a few tarnished silver pieces and then with excessive weeding. All thumb joints ached and most distal joint swollen; degenerative osteoarthritis per a hand specialist at UCSF Orthopedics Institute…
What is this “excessive weeding” of which you speak? Never too much weeding.
Ha! Try to open any kind of pill bottle! If you don’t. have a kid, you’re out of luck.
And if you cut your right finger, and are right-handed, try to open a band aid when your left hand has an tremor. Impossible! And with Afib, no NSADs even Voltaren gel — Tylenol does nothing but ruin your liver.
Good. times!
I have had to call Paul to come home from work because one of my parrots had bit me, I was bleeding, could not get it to stop, and could not put on a bandage, as it seems you need TWO hands to do that anymore. When he drove up, he insisted on taking me to the emergency room. Hours in there, the bleeding stopped. I told him, “I want to go home.” He said I should still get seen. I said that I didn’t want to spend the night there, even if I did have my jammies on (yeah, I did.) If there IS a devil, and he wants to send me to Hell… the emergency room would be it. Worst. Place. Ever.
There I was, bopping along toward 3/4ths of a century, having relatively common feelings about it all…pissed, shocked, embarrassed, baffled…all perfectly normal for my age, when I suddenly thought a whole new thought. Brand new, previously unthought thoughts have been growing exceedingly rare by now, so I pay close attention when one pops up. Frankly, I’d love to lose this particular one: I will be living the rest of my life in an actively dying body! Holy shit, a simple fact like that’ll harsh your mellow. I’m thinking of a gym membershipjust to stay strong enough to lay waste to the next joy monger stupid enough to mouth, “Chirpetty cheer, you’re only as old as you feel, tra-la-la.”
Maybe substitute “actively relaxing body?”
Are you on “blood thinners” (a.k.a. Direct Anti-Coagulants)? I am, and I found that what once would have been a minor kitchen accident can be quite dramatic. Two days before I could go without a tight band-aid.
Nope–I’m not on anything. Yet another reason my stupid finger is pretty damn insignificant.
Have you had a heart to heart chat with Keith Richards?
We haven’t spoken since the trebuchet incident.
It certainly sounds like arthritis and the initial pain for the initial onset can be fierce, but it eases off and if you just keep using your hands as normally as you can, the pain minimises and only flares up once in a while. Well, that’s been my experience anyway and I have arthritis in both thumb joints of both thumbs as well as several finger joints, all of which look just like yours and have for many years, even before I got the arthritis. I don’t miss the things I can no longer do, sewing and knitting.
It is a matter of grace to no longer mourn overmuch what you can no longer do.
Ah, but we lived long enough for Trump’s attorney to get “flush the orange turd” into the official transcript at least a dozen times.
And that might be a *little* too long.
I have peripheral neuropathy. The bottoms of my feet are getting number and number (as I get dumber and dumber). Some of my fingertips are starting to tingle. I wonder: will I continue to be able to walk, type (much of my life is computer based), knit, play piano (I can’t really do that yet anyway, but have plans)?
Diabetic?
Is peripheral neuropathy even more dangerous when you’re small and your peripherals are closer to your heart?
Yes, the vagaries of aging! I have bilateral thumb arthritis and decreased muscle strength and stiffness noted. It is a pain for this gardener ! And it is good to muse and share the changes with others. Thank you Murr, for providing a forum and I love your honest ” attitudes.”
But I have to say that it is a beautiful sunny May day and I am very grateful to have explored the earth and I plan to see and much as I can on this terminal rollercoaster ride.
Without, of course, using up too much fossil fuel!
Oh my darling. I feel this so keenly. Trigger finger on my right hand from too much weedpulling, annoying as hell. Arthritis in my right big toe that whangs so fiercely at night sometimes it wakes and keeps me up. Like Amy G, I sing the praises of diclofenac (Voltaren) and that it is now over the counter. Still I don’t slow down. This finger joint revolt of yours sucks out loud. I love you so, you hopelessly gifted writer and pianist. Life is not freakin’ fair.
I’m actually a walking example of life not being fair. I am ridiculously fortunate. Doesn’t Pete Egoscue have trigger finger exercises? Love you to the Northern Lights right back.
I used to think “loosing your grip” was a figure of speech. No more. Now it’s actual.
Now that you mention it, I had a feeling of loss of grip strength a year ago, and it’s mostly gone away. No explanation.
Jeremy — Yes to the blood thinners. I discovered there is a brownish powder, comes in tiny tubes that will stop bleeding — at least for small cuts and such that want to bleed forever. It’s called Wound Seal — I carry a tube in my purse, in the car, etc. Saves making a mess. Check out your local drug store.
That sounds interesting. I wondered what happened to all those brown bottles of mucilage from my childhood cut&paste days.
Yes Carolyn! Mucilage! I have the fondest recollection of that rubber dispenser that let out a smidge of glue when you pressed it down!
I think, if we ever met face to face, we’d spend the whole time giggling.
I do a ton of that.
Would a blowtorch work?
Yes, cauterizing works, but superglue is less painful.
Years ago, my mother was on an airplane and struck up a conversation with the gentleman sitting next to her. He noticed her somewhat gnarled fingers and asked if they hurt. They didn’t, although they looked sort of, well, gnarly. Anyway, he said if they ever DID hurt, she should seek relief as he did, by spraying the joints with WD-40! Said it had worked great for him.
I somehow don’t think that’s the best course of action . . .
Was he a proctologist?
Windex. That was the cure-of-choice in “My Big Fat Greek Wedding”. Not the same at all, but that’s what immediately popped into my head.