Picture it. A man stands backlit against the setting sun, his hands pressed at the small of his back. He rolls his shoulders. He scans the horizon. Calls the older boy, tells him to run git the draft horse into the barn.
An old woman pushes herself up from shoving another log into the stove. She rubs her elbows, her wrists, her knuckles. “Rain’s a-comin,’” she says, and her grandchild pops to her feet, with a private sigh, and goes out to fetch in the blankets on the line.
The cows lie down in the field, one after the other, masticating. Maw frowns, and then squints at the sky. Hollers at Paw to latch the shutters. Stawn’s comin’ in.
There’s a romance to it: the human antennae on quiver mode, cilia bending, the heads tilted this way, and then that, pulling in barometric information from the curling leaves and the animals and through their very pores. One more animal pulling survival out of the sparest of clues. Wisdom in the bones.
It could be said that we know even more now. But we’re one disabled cell tower away from disaster.
Our condition would be baffling for the last fifteen thousand years of our ancestors. We don’t look at the sky. Ever. We don’t know where the stars should be, or what phase the moon is in. We hoover up an unthinkable volume of invented food and poke at our devices to come up with a reason for our discomfort. We decide our sore joints are from wheat allergies, or some fabricated interpretation of normal planetary perambulations, or that we need magnets in our socks. But I will tell you what. Those old -timers may have known some stuff, but they did not know a Bomb Cyclone was coming in four days at 2pm.
Right now, Wednesday December 21, 2022, it’s sunny and in the forties, and I am bent over my palm-sized oracle like everyone else, and I know our temperature is going to plummet to fourteen degrees tonight. My joints are mute, but my phone is all over it. It’s not unprecedented, but it’s not normal. Our blow will be, relatively speaking, a glancing one. The weather models show a tight meteorological screw about to be tightened over the midwest United States and points east. It looks like a big Arctic fist. I have enough time to check my recipes and go out to get the yams, kale, coconut milk, and carrots I think I will need to make good stews and roasts for the next chilly few days.
None of it will work out if the predicted ice and wind event takes out our power. We have no idea what to do if we can’t warm up our food and our selves. I expect it will involve peanut butter, a lot of layers of clothes that owe their insulation to plastics and not fur—fur works better than anything but people will hold you in derision—and an expectation that only a few days will be involved. More, and we’re screwed. We’ve got a houseful of food but not a lot of skills, and no camp stove anymore. We should have gotten something like that. We should have stuck popsicle sticks in the frozen lasagna.
But we’ll be okay. Not because we have the habit of preparation and self-reliance, but because our devices say it will all be over in another two days. We can hunker down together in piles of blankets, with a cat in there somewhere, self-inserted. And eat Christmas cookies. And sing “Oh come oh come Electric Company.” We’ll be fine, this time.
We must have gotten the remnants of your storm here in Delaware on Friday. It was seasonable, but raining like Hell. Then, toward evening, the temperature dropped about 20 degrees. The restaurant management where Paul works e-mailed the evening shift not to come in because there would be ice on the roads that night.
I thought I saw a wood stove in one of the pictures in your last post. Even if you don’t use it all the time, it would keep a part of your house warm, and you can cook on top of it, if need be.
Yeah, no. We used to have a fine wood stove but switched over to a flick-on natural gas one a few years back, and you can actually sit on it, not cook on it. It’s slightly better for the air, but now I probably would have left in the wood stove and just used it in emergencies–they’re trying to get us away from gas appliances in general.
A good read and a chilly reminder of our diminishing self reliance. My God, it seems like only yesterday we were getting the news twice a day, and that seemed just fine! At least those long distance phone bills are a thing of the past.. Happy New Year, Murr. 🥂
And back at you, Doug! My goodness: another year of shenanigans coming up right here.
We had the Nor’easter last week. It was rainy and gusty and then sweet Georgia Brown! There was a sustained blast of wind that lasted ten minutes or so. I back up to woods and it looked like a Disney cartoon out there. Trees bent over and all the branches pointing away from the blast. I was expecting a few to come down, but we lucked out.
I remember the first time I saw something like that! ROARED up the Willamette Valley all at once and I expected to see Miss Gulch pedaling by any moment.
I stockpile candles and blankets. I can make a cup of tea using a coffee can (saved from previous emergencies) set over three candles. (we also have a gas stove and a gas water heater because I once spent a week without power or water, just me and the cats huddled under all the blankets in the house.) My niece the survivalist says we can come stay with her when things fall apart, because I know how to turn wool into socks, and my husband is a sharpshooter.
Yeah, I was a prepper before the term was in vogue. We have a wood stove and firewood for warmth. A smoker in the backyard for cooking. Chafing dishes for warming the birdies’ foods. Lots of candles, which I made myself with soy and a slow cooker. (I’m not a romantic when it comes to candles; I only have them for power outages.) Lots of food stocked up. I may never need all this shit… but I’d rather have it and not need it than need it and not have it.
I’d like to live next door to it. I know how to entertain knitters and sharpshooters…
Hunker down in blankets and eat cookies, but first go out and buy a camp stove. Just in case.
Yeah, I think you’re right. I probably even have one…in the basement…somewhere…
And what am I doing besides forgetting that I could have gone ice skating around town? Seismic retrofitting my 1915 attached- to-nothing house so it might ‘stay put’ and not slide down the street during the big one. Wishful thinking and a waste of metal hardware? Who really knows. At least my wife is happy.
That’s not nothing.
I think those “weather episodes” are called “Prairie Schooners” when they come in, hard and fast, every scrap of canvas aloft from the Northern parts of Canada?
In my (current) patch they’re called cyclones and toilet paper is stock-piled so fast some folk could live through a typhoon of typhoid.
But, so far, it hasn’t happened for quite a while. Gives folks time to worry about Irukandji. Go, look it up.
One more reason to NEVER GO NEAR THE WATER.
“Our condition would be baffling for the last fifteen thousand years of our ancestors. We don’t look at the sky. Ever. ……….””
Hasn’t our DNA magic been around for millions of years. Thousands or millions who can know so why mention science here.
Feeling like a party pooper for even thinking why no one has mentioned a LP, or even God forbid, gasoline portable generator. 4 here accumulated over 10 years as more and more buildings for pets and backup shelters needed to be heated.
Yes I have a wood stove, who wouldn’t living all year in Lower Northern Michigan. Snowbirds leave right after Thanksgiving if they have their senses and a trust fund.
When asked where do you live a Michigander holds their hand described as fur covered mitten for obvious reasons, yet exact locations are found on fingers and a thumbs.
The spot called home for our neighborhood is the Little Finger where only 80 years ago most feared to tread. Today unfortunately it’s a destination,? which rears its ugly head without an ear to the ground.
Fire up the generators feed off the 500 gallon LP tanks needed to run the water well pump, hot water, heat and even electric cooking if LP gas cook stoves seemed too high tech for politically correct young ones, and most importantly electric power for the diesel tractor engine heater.
Weakest link in these snow chains being priced out of Elon Musk internet link to the moaning and groaning outside world. It’s said $100/mo. Instead of a miser’s $55 will set me free!
Thank God for “previous earths.”
Yes indeed portable generators are noisy. Fortunately the resident wildlife know who butters their before bed treats.
For sure my sister had a backup generator but she lived in Maine and needed oxygen. Around here, it would be an indulgence for sure–we could go years without it getting too cold to survive, and there’s always SOMETHING to eat. Also? Well stocked beer refrigerator. (Can’t remember the last time we lost power in the summer.)
Seattle shut down for a day during an ice event while I was there, and back home in Oklahoma my neighbor was checking my water pipes (all good), and the lakes were churning in a freezing gale during the cyclone bomb. Now it’s in the 60s back home. Over at Southwest Airlines, computer glitches keep planes grounded for days at a time, and here and there bozos are shooting out power stations for the heck of it. When the internet is down, we can’t use credit cards to buy stuff, and hospitals can’t care for patients properly. Teslas “self drive” dangerously, and hackers hold institutions hostage for ransom. We have few backup systems to cope. We are one weaponized electromagnetic pulse away from chaos. ” Weiss, Matthew; Weiss, Martin (29 May 2019). “An Assessment of Threats to the American Power Grid”. Energy, Sustainability and Society. –EMP weapons are designed to deliver the damaging effects of a high-energy EMP that will disrupt unprotected infrastructure in the country, thus the employment of an EMP weapon against a country is the scenario of war most likely to collapse the functionality of the electrical network of the country.” But hey, happy new year.
“for the heck of it”? I only wish! They have plans, which include making it impossible for emergency services to operate. Chaos benefits revolutionaries, and we haven’t had left-wing revolutionaries in this country in decades. So that leaves…
Well thanks for all that.
Murr, you are such a delight to read—any chance you’re working on a novel, or would consider it?
I have written six novels. It is my favorite activity. I’ve been working on getting an agent for years. If I haven’t gotten published in another ten years I guess I’ll self-publish but that’s a good way to sell a hundred copies.
I have all kinds of things in my emergency stash, and some I have no idea how to use. Such as a camp stove. And the small tent. And that weird light. I keep telling myself it’s time for a dress rehearsal!
Maybe tomorrow, or the day after tomorrow.